Random thoughts and observations project

I have sped across the sky an unbelievable 20(!) times over the past 12 months, and I have another 4 trips to look forward to before December turns to January. Why am I counting? Well, my current carbon footprint has started to weigh me down...
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But saying that...weighing my bad conscience against my excitement is a tough one... I'm sure, once I have switched continents, I won't be crossing the sky quite as often as one is tempted to in Europe! :)

You see, my last trip this year will bring me back to California. This time to the more Northern parts, more specifically Silicon Valley. However, only for a fortnight this time around. Although I have been thinking about this trip for quite some time, I haven't been able to finalize my plans until very recently. I have found a cheap ticket to LA, and further, in my mind a bargain ticket between LA and San Jose. And, I have, thanks to the help of generous and kind people, found the perfect accommodation for the duration of my stay.

When will this take place? Well, I will set foot in California on Christmas day!!! :)

I'm hoping to get to know the area as I'm planning to park my cases there for a while next year.

Can you tell I'm excited..!!

To be continued... ;)

I watched another of Stephen Fry's programs from his trip across the U.S. In tonight's program he travelled through New Mexico, Arizona and Nevada.

He visited the "Garbage Warrior" in his community. I remember seeing a documentary about him and his fight a short while ago (link). I even looked him up and found a website with more information here. Plus one where a film about him is advertised here.

Stephen then continued to Monument Valley. What a stunning place!! The light, the character, the peace, the incredible beauty. I'm speechless! A place I have to visit. Although I love the ocean, I was smitten by the beauty and I wouldn't mind living somewhere where mountains and ocean meet.

Towards the end of the program he entered Nevada. He took a boat ride on a man made lake in what I understood was part of the Grand Canyon. Beautiful! He then went to "Sin City". He said that contrary to most peoples belief, Las Vegas wasn't built by the Mafia, but the Mormons... Apparently, once they had settled down in Salt Lake they made their way towards California. As the telegraph only managed 50 miles back in those days, they decided to set up "camp" every 50 miles. Las Vegas being one.

Oh, my! Torrential vertical rain outside, hammering the window panes. I like the sound of rain when I'm about to fall a sleep. :)

Good night!

I'm off to the big city tomorrow! Time for a visit to renew my indent-ity. :)

These days the embassy doesn't accept passport photos taken by a regular photographer. These days the photos required are taken at the embassy.

"Say cheeeeeze!!"

There I was, typing away, still in the office although it was 7.30pm. A colleague entered the office. And to my surprise he was covered in snow. SNOW?!

I hadn't looked outside since lunch. Crikey! And I was told it would freeze tonight. Oh, NOOOOO! Heavy snowing, an inch and counting, sleet; freezing temperatures can only mean one thing - chaos!

I decided to make it an "early night" and go home. When the temperature reaches freezing the road conditions will get even worse. For some reason snow in this country always creates havoc. No different today. I left the office. An inch and counting.

The roads were bad. Distant sirens, cars moving at painstakingly slow speed, bad visibility. Not until I had left the town centre and began my drive along country roads did I notice my headlights were totally covered in snow, none of the light made it through the thick layer. I actually had to stop and get out in the middle of nowhere to remove the snow. Ah, that's better! I could see.

Then, police signs warning us to slow down. An accident. Figures. The road blocked for at least 15 minutes. Luckily nobody seemed to be hurt. I decided to go a different route.

All in all a 20 minute drive took tonight lovingly 40 minutes. Remind me why I moved to the UK. Oh, yes! To get away from the SNOW!

Now, before long it's gonna be a couple of inches and counting.

All too soon, all too late. Questions that walk with us taking our hands every day. We assume that things are done following the due steps when out of the blue we realize they just happen when they happen and we have no control at all over them, regardless of our efforts.
We waste tons of time planning the unpredictable aspects of our lifetimes and we never ask to ourselves: "What would I be if anything was more difficult?". Sometimes I feel like The Fonz, thumb up and a silly grin on my face, an happy "Hey!" for every occasion, other times everything seems just so difficult that I just blame everything and anyone that actually is not to blame. But this is the natural flowing of the river. Attitude is what can save us. All of us.

Listening to The Fonz by the Smash Mouth, live version, slightly out of tune but powerful!

It might sounds cool from out there, but you have no idea of what's here inside. "Choose life" is ripped off Trainspotting, choose the standard, the average, the minimum if you like to, be a part of the society and let the ones with real alternatives or better chances to get in charge and command. You choose, it's up to you, master or slave. Whether your point is, there could be a third option, but the one chosen by those lads in Edimburgh is not my cup of tea, not at all. I've been close to it and I've chosen, life.

Some people need all our admiration or their constant sacrifice of their time doing things that are not directly connected to them but that under a "social" view they have a peculiar function. Magistrates, cops, I am not referring to the possessed ones, but to the ones who really do believe in what they're doing. They decided to choose life, perfectly aware that the've chosen death. I like to think -for what is worth, I know that there's a limit to my vision of truth- that the high politicians do believe to what they're doing and that the next USA election that now it's just around the corner will be something real and a lot of people will cast their vote.

We think those lifes as if they were living in a cage, a golden cage and we maybe envy them but we have not enough balls to wear their shoes completly.

Are we able to understand, really understand the meaning of brotherhood? I guss we're not. We're just able to get close to them, to lie, to believe our comfortable truth instead of getting our souls dirty and exposed in public. This is what matters to us... it's not pride in the end but a simple fear. We like to play cow boys all of the time but when you ARE a cow boy things are different, you're not playing anymore and you have to move yourself, everybody could be good, using just words... Talk is cheap. It might sounds cool from out there, but you have no idea of what's here inside.

Choose life; choose a job; choose a career; choose a family; choose a fuc*ing big television, choose washing machines, cars, compact disk players and electrical tin openers; Choose good health, low cholesterol and dental insurance; choose fixed-interest mortgage repayments; choose a starter home; choose your friends; choose DIY and wondering who the fu*k u are on sunday morning; choose sitting on the coach watching mind numbing, spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing junk food into your mouth; choose rotting away at the end of it all, pishing your last in amiserable home nothing more than an embarassement to the selfish, fucked-up brats you spawned to replace yourself; choose your future; choose life. But why would i want to do a thing like that? I chose not to choose life: I chose something else. And the reasons? There are no reasons.

Listening to an awesome song from Urban Species (if you don't know them you should!), the CD title is Listen and the song is... "Hide and seek"

Some background music... ;)


I was reminded yesterday that feeling peace while living in a cave is not feeling true peace if that feeling can be disturbed upon mixing with the rest of the world. And I agree.

Solitude is mostly thought of as something negative. Many people's attachment to this word tells the story of sadness and loneliness. I have always thought of it as a word of great beauty. Not because solitude is thought of as separation, but because, to me, it is one aspect of peace, of not being afraid of looking within.

We are often pushed around thinking we must cling on to symbols and attachments without. If not clinging without then what is there is the common reciprocal question?! My response would be....ehrm, plenty?

Looking within cannot be pursued by another, only oneself. I would therefore say that solitude opens up to the notion of everything but loneliness and separation.

I was further reminded that "listening" to what is happening in one's life is another aspect of gaining peace. Just as much as everyday events have the novelty of bringing excitement into our lives, they are also a very bright guiding beacon.

This past week I have felt like I have lost some of that foothold as my "sight" has been obscured by the well known feeling of "impatience". When I feel impatient I get antsy, and when I get antsy my confidence starts swaying.

When I look at the "evidence", when I'm really listening to what is going on, in which direction things are moving, I see a different pattern. And as soon as I acknowledge that pattern, peace moves in because I know I'm supported. It is funny how I can feel peace spreading in my body. It is a feeling difficult to describe to others. It feels like my inner world is in complete balance, and believe it or not that the equilibrium is sustained and supported by events around me.

I have come to realize that solitude in the form of listening within is very much linked to that which goes on without. Important to remember, though, is not making the mistake of letting the latter run the show.

Topsy-turvy?

..and I still haven't found that space where my mind is in par with the rest of the world. I still wonder what happened... :)

Today has been one of them confusing days where most things have gone half-arsed tits up and for no apparent reason. Yes, half-arsed tits up. :) That is even worse! Everything has just been weird. As an antidote I have been laughing my way through most of today.

It feels like my head and mind is partly somewhere else, and what is going on around me, that which I can see, hear and touch, is just a tiny fraction of all there is and this fraction doesn't feel very important in the scope of things. Whatever that scope is...

Actions constantly repeated day by day in a vicious loop, people around me complaining about anything silly and useless and today I just can't stand them. I already have my blues and it's strange that I can't talk to anybody this very day. I have to do like John Lennon did ages lot of years ago... hide them!
Becuase you can't tell anything to anybody...

Listening to You've got to hide your love away from The Beatles.

I have been working late all last week and got home when it's dark already. This morning I noticed the following on my livingroom window pane:



I don't know if you can see it. I mean the smudge. :) Is it the shape of an angel or is it just 'skidmarks' from a bird...